Learn to be selfish

Yes. The title of this post is quite controversial. But, I really can't help it and I must share my thoughts on this ASAP. 

The other day, I was telling my mom - learn to be selfish. My mom was intrigued by this as you are. 

Calm down. Let me explain my theory. 

There is a thin line between being selfless and being selfish. In all places and situations you can't be exhibiting selflessness. And nobody expects you to be a philanthropic altruistic person. 

Sometimes we do selfless things for people so that, we may be liked and loved. But, we must realise that, there are 1.3 billion people on this planet, and getting everyone to like you is impossible. 

Rather, concentrate on YOU. Improve your mental health. Invest in your physical fitness. Be selfish when it comes to your health and peace of mind. When you're selfish in caring for you, only then you can care for others by being selfless. 

When you understand this thin line, you can see wonders happening to you. You get much more clarity and happiness in your approach to life.  There is less negativity surrounding you and you decide what to take in and leave out. 

When it comes to your health, YOU COME FIRST. Others all deserve a second place. 

Start learning to be selfish. 

 

Perseverance

Recently, I watched the movie - The Shallows - once again. A really good movie indeed .

 The main protagonist Nancy Adams, a doctor by profession , had lost her mother due to cancer, and wanted to visit a secluded place that her mother used to surf. 

After few months she visits the place and begins to surf. The locals assure her that there are no sharks or any other  wild sea animals in the bay. She surfs several times and enjoys the process.

When she goes for a final last surf,  she notices a dead whale floating on the ocean. To her dismay, the whale was killed by a great white shark, which eventually attacks her. Her leg is bleeding and she swims to a nearby stone and makes up amateur stitches in her leg with her necklace. The shark, also being a persistent animal, never gives up in attacking  her. Finally , Nancy manages to kill the shark by impaling it in buoy anchor.

The movie , though, a little dark vibed and anxious to watch, shows us the tenacity and courage of both Nancy and the shark. Neither of them gives up - either in attacking or by saving themselves. 

Pondering over it, I was in the conception that, even if a shark had such a determination to hunt Nancy, then , as humans, we must show a hella-lotta-courage on our approach to life.

COMFORT ZONES

Comfort zones are situations and places where we dwell upon almost all phases in our life. 

If Nancy had just waited for help without undertaking any efforts, she would have died waiting for her saviour. The same goes with us too. Many of us choose to be in our comfort zones, rather than exploring the other side. 

How to come out of your comfort zone? 

1.) At first, its very difficult to even identify the comfort zones. Many of us don't even realise that we have permanently lodged there. Next time, when you're feeling afraid to do some things, and the inner feeling in you says, "don't do it, stay where you are and be safe" - don't listen to it. This is how you know that you're in the comfort zone. 

2.) Acknowledge your inner feeling and act in the opposite way. Venture into that difficult task.

3.) You might not do well in your first attempt at that difficult task. But it's ok. Because every veteran was once a beginner. So, keep trying. 

4.) After many trys and failures, you achieve the growth mindset and succeed in your task. 

If a shark can have the tenacity to persevere, then why can't we ? 

Failures

All my school life I strived to be the best. I at least tried to be. But now , I have lost myself in the years. I'm searching for the old version of me -- the ambitious one , the optimistic one , the brave one. 

Where am I ? What am I doing ? Is it worth sacrificing all my precious youth for this ? Should I have chosen a different career path ? All these questions ponder my brain now. 

From a young age , I wasn't accustomed to many failures. I didn't know how the failures tasted. But last year , my first failure - failing to clear the UPSC prelims , was like a tornado hit upon me , demolishing me from within. I blamed myself heavily on the process. I blamed myself for everything. I didn't feel like doing anything and just watched movies on Netflix all day. 

Then, I appeared for many other competitive exams like TNPSC and SSC. 

Guess what... I failed in those too. 

I couldn't accept it. All my friends are well settled now , and I still feel so stagnant in my life. I didn't feel independent. I didn't feel courageous. I didn't feel anything. I felt so empty from within. 

Then , I read this beautiful quote on Google , 

This quote saved me. I realised that I have changed emotionally-- substantially . After a few months, I couldn't believe myself. 

I have become more braver now, more outspoken now. And, I have this discreet confidence lingering in me all the times.

Sometimes, all my body needs is rest. I have realised that, it's okay to be quiet and do nothing and sleep -- step away from all the chaos for sometime. It kinda relaxes me overall. 

And now , even though, failures taste bitter, I won't be able to avoid them in my whole life completely. It's a part and parcel of this beautiful process. Failures made me what I am today. I thank my failures for it, and decided to move on to be the " better me ".

Even though the whole world wouldn't believe me, I will believe in me and trust my process -- for sure. 

For , hope is being able to see the light in all the darkness.  

I'm in the process of learning to embrace my failures. And , I strongly believe, you will too. 

Cuarentena thoughts

 Cuarentena thoughts...

   I have always waited for a day, where I didn't have to keep an alarm to wake up. But, didn't expect it to be in this situation.  This had been a total unexpected blow this year for all of us.

The judgement day:

The day the results came out, the only question on my mind was, " Oh God, why us? " .

   There were a lot of " Nevers " I thought of.

1. Never thought our results would have turned positive.

2.Never thought we would be one among the 6pm Case load statistics.

3. Never thought they would put up a sticker in front our house.

4.Never thought I'll re-install Whatsapp.

(And there is much more!!! You would find it very boring though, if I continue the list 😜)

   The course of the battle:

      The first couple of days were very chaotic, for I didn't understand what to do. I was really angry with the whole wide world now (over- dramatic, I know;) It was like all my stacks of dreams, came down crushing, all at once.  

      The most dreadful things you have to do, when you're "positive" is that,

·      👉you have to take in chunks of medicines

·     👉drink those tormenting bitterest of bitter fluids

·      👉doing exercises to increase your SPO2 levels and

·     👉piles of chores, adapting to whole new routine.

     As days went by, I was like in a deep state of slumber, waiting to be woken up by some external force. Every day the same old routine - eat, movies, sleep, repeat. 

What I learnt during the course?

💢 What a dramatic change needed in our food habits! These were the days I had avoided all the junk and eaten really "healthy foods". 

💢‌ It was rather a fierce battle within our minds. This period demanded tough mental strength, which I rather didn't experience for a long time now.

💢 ‌My most favourite lesson of all - learn to accept the reality and cope up with it. It's okay to be angry and stressed. It all lies in the fact that how you recover from it.

The next factor:

  I had been in a state of conundrum on how will I proceed further, building my dreams again. Remember, the external force I mentioned earlier - there is no such thing like that. Don't wait for anyone or anything to rouse you from this state of hibernation. It all resides in you - internally. Taking a deep breath, start everything afresh.

 

The other day while I was watching the movie, "Eat, Pray, Love ", I really fell for an amazing line - "One must always be prepared for riotous and endless waves of transformation". This helped me to embrace the metamorphosis, that I had been going through and be proud of it.

After all, this too shall pass...

 

   PS: Cuarentena is quarantine in Spanish.

BREAKING DOWN BARRIERS

       

                  

      

     True to the words of Jane Austen who quoted , " I hate to hear you talk about all women as if they were fine ladies instead of rational creatures. None of us want to be in calm waters all our lives." These amazing women grabbed each and every opportunity, and shined bright.

Women in battlefield: 

When at a time , princesses and queens were merely dolled up, these women chose a different path and arose as leaders.

      Velu nachiyar was among the first to demonstrate agitations against the British. Not only did she go down in the pages of history for conducting the first suicidal bombings against the colonisers , but also as a great warrior , who impressed Hyder Ali with her sheer courage and perseverance.

     Bhima Bai Holkar, belonging to the brave Holkars of Indore, excelled in guerilla warfare. As her name itself says Bhima - brave, she suppressed the British advancement into the Holkar territories.

      Kittur Rani chinnamma, staged an armed rebellion against the British to protect her territory from annexation by doctrine of lapse and later imprisoned. Still now , she is celebrated as a heroic figure in erstwhile Karnataka and the Kittur Utsav is being celebrated in her memory. 

Women in the great revolt: 

     Drawing her inspiration from Bhima Bai Holkar, the Rani of Jhansi, was one among the efficient leaders of the Great revolt. From a very young age , she mastered archery and other skills. Though she was defeated by Hugh Rose, she metamorphsed the course of the battle and also inspired women in the years to come. 

      Begum Hazrat Mahal posed a big threat to the British. William Rusell, a reporter at The Times in 1858, quoted that the Begum had excited all in Oudh , encouraged her subjects to actively participate in the revolt. She prepared the modus operandi for the battle and put up a tough resistance for the British. Till her last breath, she refused to submit to the British inspite of the promises made by them.

Women in Indian Independence movement: 

    There are a lot women, whose legacy have been unheard of. Moolmati, the mother of Ram Prasad Bismil, showed valiant stances in the Freedom struggle and portrayed a different version of motherhood. When Ram Prasad Bismil, a revolutionary was hanged by the British, Moolmati exclaimed she was proud of her son and let her another son to participate in the struggle. 

    Gaidinliu, a Naga tribe, fought incessantly against the Britishers, who exploited the tribal community with high revenue taxes and cheap labour. After her imprisonment for 14 years, she strived hard for the upliftment of tribes. This earned her the name ,"Rani Gaidinliu - daughter of the hills", from Nehru. 

    There were a lot of women who were revolutionaries and chose the path of rebellion to achieve independence. 

    Bina das, who on the day of her graduation, fired shots at the Governor of Bengal, Stanley Jackson and underwent a rigid imprisonment. Right from a young age she resisted the colonisation and looking upon SC Bose as her role model, she actively involved in revolutionary movement and was in the forefront of Freedom struggle in Bengal. 

    Aruna Asaf Ali , went underground for years to escape her arrest for hoisting the Tricolour and actively involved in politics, women rights and other social issues throughout her life. 

   Lakshmi Sahgal , a doctor by profession, enthused with SC Bose's ideas, vigorously involved with the INA and continuously voiced out for women rights even on her deathbed.

  Women were also inspired by Gandhian ideals and clinged to them lifelong. 

“Where is the other half of Egypt? I see only men who represent half the country! Where are the mothers? Where are the sisters? You must not forget that the hands that rock cradles also build persons”, a line from the famous speech of Madame Bhikaji Cama, who saw women as capable leaders-in-making and encouraged them to participate in the Freedom struggle. It is very much intriguing that, she was an important figure in the struggle, but she did this all away from the Indian soil. She was a great orator and participated in world conferences, talking about India's struggle for freedom. 

   "This is congress radio, somewhere in India", must have troubled the British a lot. Usha Mehta, ran an underground congress radio setup against the British All India Radio.She had to make personal financial sacrifices to keep up the radio going. She later said that, "A transmitter of our own was perhaps one of the most important requirements for the success of the movement" .

     Gandhi was deeply inspired by Thillaiyaadi Valliamai's sacrifice. Being at a tender age of 15, she defied all the odds and fought against apartheid and the troubles of indentured labour in South Africa. 

    Kamaladevi Chattopadhyay, was the most important figure in reviving Indian handicrafts and other cultural forms. She founded the Indian National theatre to revive theatre arts and helped in forming the Indian handicrafts board. 

    Sarojini Naidu , a well known name in the Independence movement, was an accomplished poetess. British philosopher and author Aldous Huxley wrote, " If all Indian politicians are like Mrs. Naidu, then the country is fortunate indeed.” She brought in more women participants in the Independence movement and was at the forefront in civil disobedience movement. 

   Rukimini Lakshmipati, was jailed for taking part in the Vedaranyam salt Satyagraha. She was greatly inspired by Sarojini Naidu and went on to become the first woman health minister of Tamil Nadu and advocated Ayurveda and other indigenous health systems. She joined hands with noted tamil literarian Kothainayaki ammal in the freedom struggle. 

    South India's Jhansi Rani was the title given to Anjalai ammal by Gandhi for her vigorous participation in the freedom movement. She also became the first women to involve in the non- cooperation movement from the south and sold all her properties and belongings to spend it for the freedom struggle. 

 Women in shaping the society: 

 A woman of many firsts - Dr. Muthulakshmi Reddy, earned huge respect from Gandhi , for her continuous fight against the evil devadasi system. Founder of the renowned Adayar cancer institute, she was an ardent activist for women and children rights , and fought for the Freedom cause alongside Sarojini Naidu and Annie Beasant . 

  The self respect movement in the south saw several women leaders coming out of their comfort zone . Nagammal, kannammal, Alarmelmangai thaayammal and Dr. Dharmambal to name a few. They sought gender equality and justice to not only women , but for the oppressed people from all walks of life. 

Surpassing the hurdles : 

   We can say that the present society has been moulded by these women warriors. All of them, broke the barriers of the conservative Indian mindset. They championed intercaste marriages, widow remarriages, women education, gender equality and several other rights. Some led a life of example for their ideals, thus setting a role model for the younger generation.  

   All these women , were educated . Some, exceptionally well versed. But yet, in present era India's female literacy rate is only 53.7%, creating a gender literacy gap of 21.6% in comparison with the males.

 True to the words of Ambedkar , 

"We shall see better days soon and our progress will be accelerated if male education is persuaded side by side with female education”, female literacy will create more dynamic leaders. Remembering and honouring all the fearless women would not suffice. Rather , holding on to their high virtues and following it , could change the course of our lives. 

PS: This is my attempt in writing an essay, for women's day, remembering the unheard sheroes...Thank you for reading it till the end...  Even if you didn't, it's ok 😜😜 Thank you for visiting my blog 😉😉

(This contains 20+ Indian women personalities all in one write-up.) 

   

Anarchy - book review

Anarchy by William Dalrymple — book review

    'Anarchy' unravels the enigmatic portrayal of the East India company, from its genesis, to its gradual vanishing from history. 

       "It was not the British Government that began seizing great chunks of India in the mid-eighteenth century, but a dangerously unregulated private company based in a small office, five windows wide, in London, and managed in India by a violent, utterly ruthless and intermittently mentally unstable corporate predator — Clive."

My perception was quite different from the quoted line above, until I read this book authored by William Dalrymple. 

         Dalrymple gives an extensive knowledge of the EIC, validating by excerpts from accounts of real — time  historians, letters etc.

He also gives an overview of the personality of the dramatis personae (characters which appear in the book). 

       This book contains accounts of the impeachment of Warren Hastings, the Bengal famine , insiders accounts and how the British government dealt EIC which may not be covered widely in other available sources.

       ' He (Clive) was all over estates and diamonds... and  if a beggar asks charity, he says, " Friend I have no small brillants with me.” There was also a rumour that Lady Clive's pet bird had a diamond necklace '. Many interesting facts like these are embedded in Dalrymple's book. 

     In addition, the author compares the past with the present in the epilogue (then corporate supremacy vs. now). 

      Do not get disheartened by the sheer volume of the book. It's a very slow book, since there are a lot of information to be assimilated. It's definitely worth a reading, as it furnishes a blanket account from 1600 to 1803, a much skipped history period. 

      

Environmentalism - a global history -- BOOK REVIEW

        Environmentalism — a global history

                  By Ramachandra Guha

     Environmentalism — a long neglected subject has come under great scrutiny now. Environmental movements are lighting up all over the world. This domain has to be addressed impulsively. 

       Ramachandra Guha, in this book, gives an account on how countries maneuvered this theory into practice. 

THE WAVES : 

      The book is divided into two parts or waves as Guha calls it. In the first part, he gives a brief stint about environmental thinkers and their ideologies. He further divides the first wave into three groups 

     🔸Back to the land

     🔸 Scientific conservation

     🔸 Wilderness idea 

Back to the land chapter focuses on thinkers who abhorred the idea of urbanization, scientific conservation is about taming the plundering of natural resources and wilderness idea is about disengaging human activities in a locked up area. 

        The second wave concentrates more on the various environmental movements like the Chipko Andolan, Narmada Bachao, German Greens etc... This part also provides the methods different countries use to tackle the environmental distress. Some countries which come into this frame are the USA, Germany, Australia, Brazil, China, USSR and parts of Africa. 

 THE DELIGHT: 

  The author has legibly described a generic global history on environmentalism. He also provides excerpts from various sources to establish his point. Also, the account on thinkers gives us insights into their new ideas and theories. The fact that amuses me is how

women formed the frontline in this crusade especially in the Chipko Andolan. The author says that, feminism is correlated with environmentalism and cites the lives of Medha Patkar,  Wangaari Mathai, Mira Behn, Rachel Carson etc. as examples. 

THE AVERSION :

     The back to the land chapter is rather a literary commentary, since the author quotes a lot of Wordsworth, John Ruskin and writings of William Morris, Edward Carpenter and more. A lacuna of more detailed analysis of environmental trends in different countries can be adhered to. 

ON THE WHOLE: 

     It is a good book and can be read in short span of time. An overall understanding of global environmental history can be grasped. 

Also, the author links India's stand with the other countries in this field, which provides a better comparison study. 

GLOSSARY: 

impulsively - compulsive, driven 

maneuver - handle , manipulate

aversion - not approving

adhered- bind , unite 

lacuna - void 

       

 

            

 

The Monk who sold his Ferrari

      The monk who sold his Ferrari, an intriguing and a well known title, engrosses its readers from the first page. It's narrative is in the form of a fable and rather helps us to assimilate the concepts readily. 

THE FABLE : 

     My experience in reading this book , I would say that I went on a journey with Julian Mantle in his search for self - discovery. Julian, a 53 year old,  sought after successful lawyer, collapses in a heart attack. And, later, he goes on a journey to the Himalayas to meet the mythical Sivana sages. 

    After years,  he meets his junior associate - John, who aspires to be like him. Julian, then, enlightens John on what he learned from the sages.

THE CONCEPTS: 

    Robin Sharma enshrines the concept of the seven virtues of enlightened learning, which is discussed in different chapters. With each virtue, he gives a habit changing exercise to be followed, to achieve that particular virtue. Also, at the end of each chapter, he illustrates the concepts with a mind map.  

     Julian narrates a small story encompassing all the seven virtues of enlightened learning to make us remember better 

( we remember well with stories 😜 ). 

A hint of the seven virtues are , 

    Added to it , Julian also instructs John about the

 ' Ten rituals for radiant living ' . These are 10 ways to become a better you with lots of habit changing modules.

 

FEW FAVOURITE LINES: 

🔸Never regret your past. Rather, embrace it as the teacher that it is.

🔸Worry drains the mind of much of its power and, sooner or later, it injures the soul.

🔸First of all, begin to live out of the glory of your imagination, not your memory.

‌🔸I saw the seeds of opportunity in my painful experience.

🔸The moment you concentrate the focus of your mind on a singular purpose, 

extraordinary gifts will appear within your life.

( There are several lines I liked, but won't be able to mention them all here 😊) 

WHY THIS BOOK ? 

 If you're looking for books, that can transform your way of life, undeniably, this can be one of them. Every line seemed like a quote to me. This book was a fantasy and once we read it, we will yearn to undergo a self-changing voyage just like Julian. Also, the author explains easy and simpler methods to achieve the goals. 

THE OBJECTION:

   Though the author explains numerous simple  strategies, involving all of them at the same time in our lives would be a heavy task and may create some confusion. 

PS: I read this book through a free pdf obtained from the internet. You can download and enjoy it during these days. 

Glossary

Engrosses - absorbs

Assimilate - digest 

Enshrines - elevate 

Encompassing - involving, including

   

    

     

BIOGRAPHIES- I

BIOGRAPHIES- I
People I wish I would have met ...

  K.A. NILAKANTA SASTRI 

   A remarkable historian, an eminent professor and a prolific writer. A notable alumni of Madras Christian College, many of us would not be familiar with his name, as he lead a humble  and austere life. At a time , when South Indian history was largely neglected, Sastri was the pioneer to undertake the byzantine  history of South India all over the world and inspired many historians about it. 

   His book - 'The Cholas' is a magnified content on meticulous and detailed accounts on research and relevant evidences regarding the Chozha empire. He has written numerous volumes on South Indian history.
   What intrigues me the most is his style of writing. He had an immense knowledge in the English language. When you're reading his books or articles, it's necessary to have a dictionary with you, as you can encounter a number of new words in English. He always demonstrates every reasearch with validating evidences.
   Though there are very scarce biographic works available on him, he continues to live perpetually through his works. His books act as a foundation for anyone pursuing Indian  history in detail especially on South India. He had been awarded with the Padma Bhushan, one of India's highest civilian honours for his wide contributions in the field of South Indian history. Being one of the most revered historian all over the world, he is one of the people that I wish I would have met and had an acquaintance with. 

A QUICK GLANCE:
Birth year and place : 1892 , Kalladakurichi
Died : 1975 , Mylapore .
Alma mater:
                  B.A - Madras Christian College
                  M.A - Presidency College, Chennai
Other notable works :
                 The history of South India
Postions held :
                He worked in the department of  Indian History and archaeology at the Madras University and headed the department of Indology at Mysore University.He was also a visiting professor at the University of Chicago. Director of UNESCO's institute of traditional cultures of South East Asia
Reminiscence : Sastri was very close to Dr. Rajendra Prasad and the Maharaj of Mysore.
It was Sastri who taught the Maharaj of Mysore Sanskrit.

PS : Glossary

Austere -  giving little or no scope for pleasure, morally strict 

Byzantine - complex , elaborate

Meticulous - careful, diligent

          

  
 

A myriad of words !

 " Raise your words , not voice.

It is the rain that grows flowers , not thunder." 

                                    - Rumi 

A sonnet on WORDS ( by the Blog author )

Words are deep 

Words are peace 

Words are soul 

Words are real 

Words are fair 

Words are lives

Words are wise 

Words are love 

Words are felt 

Words are good 

Words are apt 

Words are cosmos 

Words are manifold 

On the whole , words craft the world.

    

              

These are some of my favourite words. Though, there are a myriad of words that I love,  I have listed only a few, and remember, 'words are the verbal embodiment of power' 

(quoted by Robin Sharma).  

PS : What are your personal favourite words ? Comment below . 

ME !

 

" To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness." 

                                     - Robert Morley 

 When I started loving myself, I was able to understand how unique I am. I can write pages and pages about myself. That's when you know that you've discovered yourself wholly. 

 

   These are some wordings about myself. 

I have composed it with just two words which describe me befittingly. And , these wordings are very much motivational to me. 

   PS:  Which of the above wordings that you can relate yourself to ? 

 Comment below . 

How to study by Harry Maddox

How to study by Harry Maddox
Book review
First publication-1969

               A very challenging and arduous task to do - studying. Some master this skill, some don't. But , do remember, " Every expert was once a beginner". Therefore, it's never to late and you're never too old to ace this artistry.
              I wish I had got hold of this book years ago and put those amazing techniques into practice, right from the beginning. But I'm really glad that I have it now. 

             'How to study' by Harry Maddox is a blessing for students who really want to perfect their learning skills . It's first publication was in 1969, and you may presume that, the tactics mentioned there is outdated. Dear reader, if you have that kind of assumption , you're totally wrong. The author's strategy is perennially actionable.
" Even today I dare not say that I have reached a state of achievement. I'm still learning, for learning is boundless."
                - Bruce Lee
           The methodology composed here is very much pragmatic and easy to follow with strong experimental testimonials. Added to it, the author has presented numerous graphs to validate his methods.
                   I strongly suggest you to own a copy of it, so that, you can refer it anytime. Firstly, read the whole book and then mark the important chapters that  you want to skill over and re-read it. For instance, I prefer the chapters mentioned below for re-reading -
✓motives and habits
✓ learning and remembering
✓ reading
✓ thinking

                The author also gives an account of the  widely harnessed SQ3R method and how to put into practical use. This is a wonderful book in simple narrative to enlighten your studies. Try to lay your hands on it very soon .
"Efficient methods of study are worth learning not only for your immediate purposes of study, but because your habits of work will stay with you all your life. Those who do well in academic work usually do well afterwards in business or in the professions."
                              -Harry Maddox